American Idol auditions

They're Monday, September 5 at the FedExForum. Be there no later than 8 a.m. and even then you may not be able to audition. Get a release form from Idolonfox.com and bring it with you. You can bring one friend but not a musical instrument. You may not have any of the following:

• a contract for talent representation (for example, a talent agent or manager)
• a music recording contract
• an acting and/or modeling contract
• a merchandising agreement or
• any other contractual arrangement that would prohibit you from entering into a management contract, recording contract, talent contract, acting contract and/or merchandising contract.

Good luck and remember when you land that big ass contract that you not only heard about it here but you beat out me and my infamous rendition of "They're Coming to Take Me Away."